We are told that sex and love are part of the same instinct; I disagree. Love is a pleasant sensation of comfort we feel when we’re close to a special person. LIVRO EM DESTAQUE. DR. FLÁVIO NO YOUTUBE. Assine o FEED do canal do Dr. Flávio no Youtube e mantenha-se atualizado conforme novos vídeos são. As for his theoretic work, in he presented studies about sex therapy; his first and critically acclaimed book, published in , was about sex, love, and.
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They make a lot of noise, shout, are dramatic and even threaten violence. I attribute the human tendency to sabotage their own well-being to this traumatic experience, that affixes itself to the mind in an absolute manner. These are beliefs, inherited points of view. What makes so many women and men offer explanations to an angry spouse, when they come home late from work? Individualism is a word that can generate controversy and misunderstandings.
Due to his immense success as a psychotherapist, he preferred his practical experience with patients over theoretic studies although theory has always played an important part in igkovate learning process, and has influenced him throughout the years. Psychical processes follow a very peculiar logic, which must be discovered in their own specific way.
However, strong-willed people are only calm and peaceful when everything goes according to their wishes.
A strong one will be brave enough, because they know livrks can handle setbacks. Theoretically, lastingly romantic marriages should be more common than those based on an exuberant sex life. As such, in this book he rethinks several myths and half-truths about sex and addresses controversial issues. But that makes them noisy, not strong — these two words are not synonyms!
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Very few couples live well together and have a relationship conducive to emotional and intellectual growth. Up to that point, they had been happiest being held by their mothers, in a peace and comfort such as they lost at birth, feeling for their mothers what we call love. However, a few flavjo might help us make fewer mistakes. When it happens, I believe it is because the word has several meanings and evokes different emotions for different people, according to their understanding of it.
Being strong means accepting, dealing with and assimilating all kinds of pain and setbacks that life inevitably brings. It creates a kind of conditioned response, so that when people achieve a sort of harmony and well-being similar to what they had experienced in utero— and nothing feels more like that than the comfort and closeness that come from a good romantic relationship—they immediately feel threatened, as if waiting for tragedy falvio strike.
His books, usually, hit the top of sales for theoretic, dense essays in Brazil about 40, copies each, along the years.
Love and freedom encounter another peculiar barrier, which is cultural conditioning. SinceI have been trying to understand the components that determine how romantic partners are chosen. The truth, however, is that the fear of happiness gikocate to be universal, and I have never met anyone who did not feel it to some extent. Gikovate has seen, in his private practice, about patients.
For instance, he never shied away from using pharmacology when necessary, and benefited from experiences with psychoanalytic treatment, which he attended for five years, and behaviorist therapy he learned in the University of London in It has been translated to English, as well, and has been published in Italy already.
He has also written three books directed to a younger audience, with a didactic slant; these books sold aboutcopies. Theoretically, lastingly romantic marriages should be more common than those based on an exuberant sex life. This could not be further from the truth, however. I suddenly realized that when people fall in love they start living in a constant state of alert—of panic, even—as if they expected a tragedy to befall them at any moment.
They now associate harmony with a disaster that will destroy their happiness; after all, their uterine peace was destroyed, and they still fear that similar feelings will have a similar ending. Yet this kind of relationship causes both partners problems, for they will ultimately go through situations of sorrow and disappointment.
Yes, because it means one has accepted reality.
On Being Alone… | Dr. Flávio Gikovate
What I propose is radically inverting the way we think about it. In our current cultural environment, people who stand out are considered important. He believes that adults today have two options: It would probably be great to be able to control the outcome of important events.
I suddenly realized that when people fall in love they start living in a constant state of alert—of panic, even—as if they expected a tragedy to befall them at any moment.
His book about freedom hit 40, copies. However, this does not mean he is not equally talented as a lecturer, writer and divulger of his thoughts. After all, if we acknowledge that each brain is unique, and the way one person thinks is in not a frame of reference to understand others, we realize that we do not need to bend someone else to our standards.
For instance, his most recent book — Evil, Good and Beyond has sold 24, copies in 24 months, and is still going strong, sales-wise. Very few couples live well together and have a relationship conducive to emotional and intellectual growth. However, this pursuit of clarity has caused his content, on occasion, to be dismissed as simplistic. A criticism of the traditional set of values; hr very clearly and courageously sees both selfish and generous personas as flawed; Selfishness exists only when juxtaposed against overt generosity or goodness ; however, a search for fairness could be the answer for both social and individual relationship problems.
Based on his believe that sex and love are two autonomous and often antagonistic impulses, Gikovate points out the strong association between sexuality and aggressiveness especially in men.
happiness | Dr. Flávio Gikovate
While still in-utero, our brain develops in an environment filled with comfort, peace and harmony. People are beginning to understand that they even if they feel like a fraction of a person, they are whole — just like their partner, who is not a knight in shining armor or a savior, but a travel companion. Instead of focusing so much on overweight people and their habits, we should pay attention to the way thinner people live. In this work, Gikovate explains how to take the second path — definitely more difficult, but far more rewarding.
Gikovate proposes that we reconsider our current worshipping of desire, since it serves to valorise casual sex, preserve selfishness and promote emotional immaturity — things that decent people have been trying to free themselves of for the longest time.
This could bring about couples formed by fair people, more mature to experience love. He is also a frequent guest at the top-rated, most respected talk shows in Brazilian TV. This assumption is also at the root of the theory that opposites attract, in which a partner should be what the other, supposedly incomplete person, is not; if one is quiet, the other should be combative, for instance.